I love to read comments so please, comment away! I will always reply!
All content licensed... don't be a thief.

Tuesday, January 21, 2014

An open letter to the jackholes on the road:

Dear asshat in the snow covered car in front of me after the last snowfall,

You clearly took a few seconds this morning to clean off your front and back windows so that you could see while driving. Kudos to you for attempting to drive safely after Mother Nature dumped on you the night before.

While you were using that scraper to clear the windows, did it occur to you to be thorough and clean off the top of the car as well? I'm guessing not, judging from the 10 inch dome of white shit on top of your car. Maybe it was just time to jump in the car and start texting while driving, while you weaved in and out of lanes on the way to work. You're a busy person on a mission. I get it.

You know, I'm all for surprises...especially ones that make me giggle.

But having a good 5 inch brick of snow and possible ice RIP its way off of your car and hit my windshield at full force going 60 down an interstate is NOT the surprise that I had in mind that day. It's even less of a wanted surprise if it startles me enough to pee or shit on myself... or god forbid jerk the wheel and put my family (and others) in danger due to the fact that your lazy ass couldn't follow through with your snow removal.

I guess you're just in so much of a hurry that you can't be bothered with doing a better job, huh? Letting the wind clear off your vehicle is more convenient for you, right? How about if I drive in front of you down the interstate for a distance while letting my kids throw things out the window with the same density as your snow missiles? Would you like that? I doubt it.

Take 5 extra minutes in the morning and clear off the top of your car. It'll give you something to do while you car tries to warm itself in the frigid temperatures.
And put down the damn phone and pay attention to the road.

The lady that almost peed her pants the last time

Tuesday, January 14, 2014

Hey there A-Lister...thanks for sharing

Isn't it weird that the minute a celebrity starts making a lot of money, they don't seem to need that much money?

It's a given that if you are a celebrity on the rise, or already in the stars, you'll get free gifts.
It's not because the people at that company give a crap about you.
It's so that when you are photographed later carrying that purse or wearing those shoes, that company will most likely see a spike in sales.

It's a daily occurrence in Hollywood. And I don't really have a terrible problem with it.
(Although it would be nice if companies would give me free stuff.)
I think I recall Snoop saying once that when he went to New York, he never took luggage. He knew that stores would start sending him stuff before he even got off the plane.

What I have a problem with is that some of the celebrities will take tons of pics of said freebies and post them on Twitter and Instagram, all the while basically boasting that they get free crap.

Um, as an average American, I don't like to see you flaunt your thousands of dollars in merchandise in my face every two seconds while I try my ass off to get people to buy my jewelry... in a recession. It's great that you have 6 closets full of crap you'll wear once or a converted garage to hold your wardrobe.
But it would be even better if you'd stop bragging about it, not matter what Burlington says.

What I want to see is a Tweet from a star saying:
"Chanel just sent me 2 new bags and a pair of shoes! Since I can afford to buy those things myself but was sent these gifts before having my personal assistant schlep down to buy them, I'm going to take the money that it takes to purchase these items and donate it to a local school district in need."

That would be fantastic.
They would feel a little better about themselves (hopefully) and they'd be a great influence on their younger, more impressionable fans... don't you think?

Cause really.... what are they saving all that money for?
Last I heard, you can't take it with you.
And I doubt God cares what shoes you wear.

Monday, January 13, 2014

No, I haven't died from exposure

Hello all. It's been a little while, huh? I'm still alive and kicking and finally thawing out.

Unless you were trapped in a bunker the last week, you must know that most of the country was experiencing much colder temps than normal. And of course, Minnesota was no exception.

But first, let's start with my hometown and where my family lives down south.
During the winter, they might see a light dusting of snow and the temps will dip a little and make them all start reaching for fur panties. (God, that just made me vomit a little. Who came up with that?)

This year, THIS YEAR, they got a little more than they expected.

I'll be honest... I cannot recall the last time it was that cold down south. And they were actually getting warnings about wind chills, frostbite, and hypothermia. My response when told by my sister that they had the warnings? "Welcome to my world."

But you'll notice, that weather didn't last too long. Within a few days, the lows were back up to around normal for this time of year. So to me, they got a much better deal.

As for us in the upper Midwest, well.... shit happens, I guess.

Do you see the difference in the amount of time that the weather flat out sucked? We had 12 straight days of the lows being on the wrong end of 0.
And don't get me started on that damn wind chill. The lowest that we saw on Weather.com's app was -50. Yes, -50 degrees is what we felt if we ventured outside. (I did not. You couldn't have dragged me out there at gun point.)

By far, that was the coldest weather that I have experienced in my almost 6 years of living in the Twin Cities. And I'll be honest.... if I could have run away, I would have done it. I am just not built for this sort of nonsense. (But then again, who is?)
I mean, when it's colder here than it is in Barrow, Alaska, something is wrong. (Barrow is the northernmost US city. It can snow ANY MONTH of the year. The high temperature is above freezing on an average of only 120 days per year, and there are 160 days of sub-0 °F. Also, they don't see daylight for about 65 days of the year.) 

For real, it was so much colder than what is expected and tolerated that Gov. Dayton actually closed the schools on that Monday. Each district had the choice of staying closed on Tuesday and I believe that they all did stay closed.
Yeah, MN kids don't get snow days.
MN kids get 'it's too damn cold to leave the damn house' days.

Luckily, the weather has rebounded here like in most of the country. And to most people, 20 degrees isn't that warm. But when 20 degrees means that it's about 70 degrees HIGHER today than last Monday, we will take it.

Besides the weather being harsh and making me want to hibernate, we have been working on Hell House and trying to get it done. The drywall is all done and we have walls again. We are now in the painting stages and after the first day, my thighs were pissed at me.
I guess when you don't do squats on the regular and then spend 2 hours squatting and then going right up to your toes, your muscles will scream like that the next day.

I plan to be around a little more while we are finishing up the house. And then hopefully, I will be here more regularly.